Commander (Politics of Love) Read online

  He held my gaze as his chocolate-covered tongue dipped into my bellybutton and then trailed to the swollen folds of my labia.

  Spreading my thighs apart, his attention moved to my soaked sex. He circled the sensitive bundle of nerves of my clit three times before spearing deep into my sopping pussy. He ate me like a man starved, bringing me to the edge of orgasm too many times to count.

  “Please,” I whimpered, throwing my head back. Tears rimmed my eyes as my need was to the point I wouldn’t be able to go on any longer without release. “I can’t take it anymore.”

  “I know, baby. I won’t make you wait any longer.” He rose to his feet, pulling me to the edge of the counter.

  He cupped my face, thumbing the tears of frustration dampening my cheeks, and kissed me hard and with a passion that had my head reeling.

  “Do you want me?”

  “Dammit, Ashu. I never stopped wanting you.”

  “I know. I just needed to hear you say it.”

  Reaching between our bodies, he pushed down his pants and freed his thick, hard cock. He positioned himself at my entrance and slammed in to the hilt.

  We both cried out at the same time.

  “How is it you’re so tight? I’ve fucked you six times in less than two days.” He pulled out and hammered back in.

  “Why are you asking me stupid questions? I need to come. Will you fuck me already?” I bit his shoulder but kept my hands on the island.

  The sadistic bastard would probably stop if I moved them.

  “Sheathe the fangs. I’ll make it good for you.”

  Ashur fisted my hair with his fingers and gripped my hip tight, ensuring I’d probably have another bruise or two to add to the ones Casey gave me from sparring. Then he set a hard, unrelenting pounding that had me sliding up the stone counter to only be brought back again to meet his thrust.

  The friction ignited the almost painful ache Ashur had stirred, and I erupted, bowing my back as my hard nipples scraped against his chest.

  Sensations of falling filled my mind, and my pussy clamped down on his pistoning cock.

  Just as I was coming down, Ashur changed his pace and my need started again. He made me come one more time before he let go and collapsed against me on the granite.

  “Damn. This is incredible.”

  I shook my head at Ashur as he inhaled his sixth piece of French toast. The way he was eating it was a wonder his body was still so rock hard.

  “Want me to make another batch? I have the ends of the loaf left.”

  He looked up from his plate. “Are you saying I’m eating like a pig?”

  “Oink, oink.”

  He picked up my plate and set it in front of him. And then preceded to eat again.

  I gawked at him.

  He looked up. “What? Fucking you senseless worked up an appetite. I need my energy if I’m to keep up with a wife who is five years younger than me and has an insatiable need for my cock.”

  “If you want to use me as an excuse, go right ahead.”

  He gave me his heart-stopping grin. “Can I use that excuse when I want a blowjob in my office between meetings?”

  “You’re incorrigible.”

  “Yes, but it still doesn’t take away from the fantasy of having my wife sucking my cock in the middle of the Oval Office.”

  “Not going to happen.” I scrunched up my face in exaggerated disgust. “A distant predecessor of yours already took that idea.”

  Ashur used the last piece of French toast to sop up the maple syrup before bringing it to his mouth. He licked his lips and hummed.

  How did a man make eating a kid’s breakfast look so damn sexy?

  “Want to go for a run?” Ashur said, as he pushed back from the table.

  Glancing toward the Secret Service agents patrolling the grounds outside the giant bay window of the breakfast nook, I said, “Are we allowed to leave the cabin?”

  “Tara, I own this property, including the land. We aren’t prisoners, we just happen to be two people who require a lot of security.”

  “Won’t it cause a logistics nightmare for Jake and the rest of the Secret Service agents?”

  “They know the drill. It would surprise them more if I holed up inside the cabin. I’m known for my runs in the middle of winter, with snow and ice on the ground.”

  “Yeah, you are a bit obsessed with running. I’ll stick with martial arts and yoga. The only reason my ass gets out to run is because my trainer makes me do it as part of my required bi-weekly training sessions.”

  Fuck, why’d I say that?

  He studied me for a moment, and I held my breath. Please don’t have picked up on the last thing I said.

  “I’m sure I could get you to enjoy runs.”

  I nearly sighed in relief.

  “The only way I’d enjoy long runs was if there was a giant piece of chocolate cake waiting for me at the end as a reward.”

  “Would a bout of hot, sticky, raunchy sex do?”

  My pulse jumped.

  He laughed, reached over to cup the back of my head, and planted a hard kiss on my lips. “Like I said, insatiable.”

  “Ashur?” I murmured, pulling back a bit and staring into his eyes.

  “Yes.”

  “I love being here like this. It’s simple and…” I paused. “I’m not sure how to say this. It’s easy. Does that make sense?”

  “Yes, it does.” He rested his forehead against mine. “You don’t have to always be on guard with me. You can talk to me.”

  Tears burned the backs of my eyes.

  “I want to. I’ve never had anyone to truly share things with, but I’m worried that once you know my secrets, you’ll…” I trailed off, turning my head away.

  “You can trust me.” He tilted my chin up. “Tara, we all have secrets. Yours can’t be any worse than mine.”

  “I’m not squeaky clean like you are. I don’t do the right thing even if it will cost me.”

  “You think I don’t know that you’ve circumvented numerous international laws in your pro-bono work? Honestly, I’m impressed no one besides Edgar ever challenged you on it.”

  “I’m a liability to you.”

  “I’ll worry about that. Your need to protect and fight for the underdog is what has endeared you to so many around the world. Although, I’d appreciate if you would refrain from joining any underground organizations of crazy crusaders until I’m out of office.”

  I winced inside. Oh boy. I was up shit creek. The plans to get Ameera back were as crazy and vigilante as they got.

  He must have noticed my reaction to his words. “Tara, trust me. I trust you.”

  Trusting him was something I never thought I could do. Now I wanted to so desperately confide in him, find comfort in him, to know that he would still be there in the end.

  “I’ll try,” I whispered.

  “That’s all I can ask. I’ll fight for you, T-Rex.”

  My heart skipped a beat. He’d said the one thing that would put a crack in my defenses against him.

  “I swear I’m going to kick Tyler’s ass,” I muttered. “Why do you call me that? You don’t even know why he gave me the name.”

  “I know. It’s because you are tiny, with little arms, but could bite anyone’s head off if they got in the way of your causes.”

  “I’ll show you tiny arms.” My fist flew out to punch his shoulder, but he caught it in the palm of his hand.

  “Fast, but not fast enough, young Padawan.”

  “Young Padawan, my ass. My days as an apprentice are long behind me. I’m a full-fledged Jedi Master.” I beamed at him.

  And here was another thing we had in common. Our mutual, geeky love of all things Star Wars.

  “Come on.” He ran a thumb over my knuckle. “Let’s see if you can keep up with this old man. For the next few hours, it’s just you, me, and nature.”

  I turned up my nose at the last word of his sentence, which resulted in an eye roll from Ashur.

  A
shur stood, scooping me up and then throwing me over his shoulder.

  I screamed. “What are you doing? Put me down.”

  “To change. We’re going to go for a run, and the hell if I’m going to let anyone see you in a bathrobe, Jedi Master or not.”

  “You really are a Neanderthal as Tyler said, Mr. Kumar.”

  “Never denied it, Mrs. Kumar.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  I groaned inside as I adjusted my pillow for what felt like the hundredth time. For over an hour, I’d tried to sleep but nothing worked. It was still pitch-black outside and even the annoying birds were sleeping. Which meant, I couldn’t use them as my excuse for the insomnia I was going through. I covered my face with my arm and released a deep breath.

  There was no use in pretending I had no clue what was bothering me. We’d leave for Washington after breakfast and I couldn’t help but worry what it would be like between us when we took on our roles as president and first lady and not just a man and woman totally into each other.

  Would we live separate lives and only come together for sex and the occasional event or would we have a relationship as my parents had? One where we shared everything that wasn’t confidential to our jobs.

  My emotions were running wild, and the need I felt for Ashur was confusing the hell out of me.

  These past few days he’d been the boy I’d fallen in love with as a girl but in the package of the man he’d become. He’d gotten me to enjoy our early-morning walks and late-night strolls. Although he hadn’t proven to me running was worth it. We’d even broached the subject of his father, discussing in detail Minesh’s manipulation and even what he’d done to Samina when she’d decided to pursue a career far away from Texas.

  I’d found myself wanting to confess everything about who I was and what I’d done, countless times. But I’d kept things quiet, not wanting anything to taint our time at the cabin. Plus, it was better to have all the information and then tell Ashur everything. As soon as we got back, I’d meet with Tyler, settle on the final logistics of the auction and Ameera’s return, and then decide how I’d talk to Ashur.

  I had no doubt Ashur would keep my secret. It was better that he knew so he could head off any future fallout.

  I sighed.

  I’d have to wait and see if he could accept who I was. Who I work for…who I worked for.

  God, how was I going to give up the job that had given me my identity? I still had four months to change my mind.

  Fuck, there was no way this couldn’t end in disaster.

  Then there was the contract. It was my safety net in my relationship with Ashur. He’d offered the money and I’d accepted it. But now, especially after this week, I could see us truly making this a real marriage.

  Would it be as simple as saying I wanted to tear up the contract?

  What if I took the step and he turned his back on me when he learned about Solon? Ashur said he knew I’d hedged international law and accepted what I’d done as a way to save lives and to protect the innocent.

  But would he feel the same when he learned that there was no hedging, I’d broken nearly every law of every country when it came to engaging with negotiating with terrorists and had no guilt whatsoever in doing it.

  His whole election platform had been about doing the right thing, making decisions within the confines of the law and procedure, and working across party lines. He viewed vigilantism as undermining government stability. I couldn’t blame his views on his military career. He’d thought this way when I’d first met him. He’d always say, “If you don’t like the way things are run, then vote them out or work to pass new laws.”

  The fact I’d engaged in espionage would be a hard pill for him to swallow.

  He’d chiseled away so much of the protection I’d had surrounding my heart that I wasn’t sure I could handle his rejection.

  Maybe it was better to focus on living out the terms of the agreement rather than risk giving him my love and having him turn his back on it.

  Who are you kidding? He’s held your heart since you were eighteen. No wall you erect around your emotions will change how you feel about him.

  Turning to my side, I looked at Ashur and caught him watching me.

  “What are you thinking about so hard?” he asked.

  No way was I going to tell him. I was feeling raw enough.

  “Sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you.”

  “I couldn’t sleep either.”

  He moved over to me, caging me with his giant arms.

  “Stop worrying. We’re married. We’ll figure out the details as we go. I’m sure this first lady thing will be a breeze compared to your pro-bono work.”

  And then there was the other thing I’d tried to forget over the last week.

  My new role.

  “Wrong, I’d rather deal with the hell of international litigation.” I set my hand on his shoulder. “I don’t know how to be the first lady. All I know is me.”

  He leaned down until we were nose to nose. “You are the one I want. The woman who made something of herself on her terms. The woman who commands respect because she isn’t afraid to face off against the scariest motherfuckers in the world to protect an innocent child.”

  “You say this now, but you may not feel the same when you learn everything I’ve done.”

  “Do you really think I’m so innocent? When my plane went down in North Africa, do you really think I was there for a joy ride?”

  I’d heard rumors over the years that Ashur and Veer had been spying for the government when their plane was shot down by a rebel group in South Sudan.

  “You weren’t breaking American law. You were following orders.”

  “Tara, you’re too good of a lawyer to break any law to a level you can’t talk your way out of.”

  I almost grimaced. He viewed me in a way I never deserved. It would have been so much easier if he’d never wanted more from me and kept the business-only plan we’d agreed to in the beginning.

  “Stop worrying. Have you not figured it out? I lo—”

  I lifted my mouth to his, cutting off his words. He was tying me in knots, and if he said the words, I’d lose myself even more than I already had.

  But he pulled back, pinning my arms above my head with one of his as he tugged my thighs apart and settled his naked body between my legs.

  “I wasn’t finished.” He loomed over me, his gaze both sleepy and intense.

  “Please, Ashu. Don’t.” A tear slipped past my eye.

  “I get you aren’t ready to hear it but it doesn’t change how I feel.”

  The tip of his cock slid along my dampening cleft.

  “Why are you saying this? We have an agreement.”

  He pushed into my swollen pussy, making me gasp and arch against his hard thrust.

  “A piece of paper doesn’t change the fact we’ve always wanted each other.” He pulled out and slammed back in. “That what we felt for each other has never changed.”

  Before I could retort he spoke again. “Don’t even think about denying this thing between us. This is more than sex, more than making a baby. It is more.”

  “Why won’t you leave it alone?” I tried to tug my hands free, which only intensified his hold on my wrists and the pace of his cock pounding into me.

  My body responded and a spasm shot through my core, contracting around his cock.

  “Because I never skim over the truth, and the truth is that you belong to me.”

  Ashur continued to stare into my eyes as he held my hip with each drive of his cock.

  I couldn’t look away and I knew he saw how I felt. How I needed him. How lost I was in him.

  “Ashu, please,” I whispered. And I wasn’t sure what I begged for, my orgasm or an end to the emotions he stirred in me.

  As my body teetered on the cusp of release, my heart told me I’d only have him for a limited time. He saw so much in black and white, wrong and right. And I was a hodgepodge mixture of a technicolor rainbow
.

  If it came down to choosing between following the rules and breaking every law to get Ameera back, I’d break the laws in a heartbeat.

  Another tear slid past my lids.

  “Look at me.” Ashur bit my lower lip, bringing my focus to him. “This is us. Don’t ever forget what we are to each other.”

  He cupped my breast, rolling the tip with his fingers, and then pinched the sensitive nub.

  My gaze clouded as the pleasure-pain sent me over, and my release washed over me, back bowing and pussy squeezing in waves around his girth.

  “You’re mine, Tara. You were always mine.”

  “Yes,” I answered, digging my heels into the backs of his thighs. “As long as you want me.”

  “Forever.” He pulled out to the tip and then slammed into my spasming pussy. “No other woman holds a candle to you.”

  Ashur’s pace grew unsteady and a few moments later he came in hard spurts.

  “Hi Leara,” I said as I entered the area leading to the Oval Office. “Is the meeting over?”

  “Yes. You can go right in.”

  I smiled and took the short hallway to the Oval Office.

  The second Ashur and I had stepped through the doorway of the White House, Ashur was bombarded with requests and issues that required his immediate attention. One of them being a last-minute trade summit in Oslo that he’d have to leave for in two days’ time.

  There went the hope we’d get to ease into our marriage and our roles.

  Now it was four hours later and I had no idea what to do. I’d unpacked, explored, officially meet all the White House staff as first lady, and checked in to make sure everything was still on target for Ameera’s auction.

  If only I had a pile of briefs to keep me occupied. No matter how much I dreaded the time-consuming task of reviewing case files, at least it would keep me occupied and not roaming the halls of the White House.

  What the hell had I just thought? I was on a mission to become un-bored by seducing my husband.

  I paused outside the door and waited until the guards opened it for me to walk through and then closed it behind me.

  Ashur looked up from the papers he was reading and smiled.